G-damn Mother-f-ing... I Can't Believe This!!! (Wait. Yes I can.)

Georgia's dad is in jail right now. Logically you might think, "Well, this proves that he is not fit to parent a small child at this point in his life." But that is not what the courts think. Instead they think, "Let's put everything on hold while dad is in jail and then we'll talk about being a dad later, after he is done serving his sentence."

AAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!

The only time courts here will terminate parental rights due to the length of a parent's incarceration is if the parent will be locked up for a substantial portion of the child's life before the child reaches the age of 18. So, basically, unless dear old dad gets convicted and then sentenced to (roughly) 10 years or more, we are stuck in limbo. Georgia could literally live with us for the next 5 years, and then go home to live with her dad once he gets out of jail and finishes working on his case plan. Fucking unbelievable.

If Georgia's dad gets convicted and receives the maximum sentence, Georgia would be older than I am right now by the time he gets out. So it's conceivable that her dad will be deemed unfit to parent based on his recent arrest. But what are the chances that he'll actually get the maximum sentence? I've seen this man testify before a judge. He presents himself well. He's not dumb or mean or anything less than humble and polite.

He basically just sentenced his daughters to an unknown number of years in the foster care system. At the end of which, they will be old enough to actually be aware of what's going on, and will feel all of the pain and loss that will go along with losing the only family they have ever known once dad takes them away from their foster families.

Okay. I'm jumping to a lot of conclusions here. I'm just all worked up over this. I'll let you know what happens...

Boing!

Set up the bouncer today. Clark super loved it. Of course he did. His little legs move non-stop. He's strong, too! He wore himself out pretty quickly. I'm sure he'll have his stamina up in no time.

Henry was sitting really close to Clark while he was in the bouncer tonight and Clark suddenly kicked off and the bouncer popped Henry in the lip. Henry turned to me and said, "Mouth!" Yay! Oh, my little boys! Growing up!

Henry Says

As I've mentioned before, Henry has speech delays. They're pretty profound. He has very few words in his vocabulary. His therapist has identified his problem as an issue of being able to recall the words he needs. Henry can understand what other people say very well. If you ask him to point to a picture of a banana out of a stack of cards, he can identify the banana without a second's hesitation. But then hold up that same card and say, "What's this?" and he'll say, "Apple." Every fruit is an apple. Every color is red. Every vehicle is an airplane. His therapist calls this "getting to the right neighborhood but going to the wrong house."

Anyhow, over the past week or so, Henry has had a small language explosion. Nothing to make us say, "He's totally getting it! Everything's clicked! No more therapy!" But definitely a step in the right direction. I held up his windbreaker as we were getting ready to leave the house today and asked, "What's this?" and he said, "Jacket!" He's started saying milk, boo boo, get down... it might sound like no big deal that a kid who's almost 3 years old would be saying these simple words, but it really is a big deal for Henry and I'm so so so so happy about his progress.

I'm trying not to be too hopeful that everything will just suddenly click or that his progress will start speeding up. BUT he's been doing so well this past week. I hope for his sake that we can get him mostly caught up by the time that he starts elementary school. Fingers crossed!!!

Liar Liar

elise just told her first lie!!!

elise pinched henry and i told her to say she's sorry. instead she said, "georgia do that." georgia isn't even at home right now! man oh man.

Sick Again

clark has had a fever for the past day and a half. the fever broke this morning, but now he has a rash. roseola? poor baby.

elise only had a rash for one day, then she felt better. hopefully clark's recovery will be as quick.

Crying Fit

Clark had his first big crying fit tonight. Cried for almost an hour. Couldn't make him stop for any considerable length of time. Just had to wear himself out. It sucked.

Multitasking

Whose job description requires the ability to pleasantly and enthusiastically read "The Very Busy Spider" to an audience of children while at the same time sitting on the toilet having diarrhea? A stay at home mommy, that's who.

Let The Games Begin

Elise broke out in a rash yesterday. Head to toe. I called her doctor's office and spoke with a nurse and she said that it sounded like a virus. Nothing we can do about that. Call back if her symptoms get worse. Fortunately, they didn't get worse. No rash today, never had a fever.

However, today Clark is super cranky. He also has an elevated temperature. Not officially a fever, but his sweet little baby body is fighting something off. "Something" being whatever Elise contracted and then passed on to him.

So I'm sure that Henry and Georgia will have the virus soon, too. Then Husband and me. Ugh. I totally understand the expression that an illness can "sweep through a population."

Eye Check

Today I had my first eye exam in over 2 1/2 years. Nothing major to report. The doctor said that my eyes have changed a little bit, but because I'm breastfeeding, my hormones could be affecting my eyes. She didn't change my prescription. My eyes COULD go back to having slightly better vision in the future, once I stop nursing.

Man. Babies really do a number on your body. Not even your eyeballs are safe.

I thought I was going to have my eyes dilated today, but apparently the medication that they use to dilate you can come out in your breast milk. For some reason that surprised me. I assumed that a drop or two of some medicine in your eyes wouldn't have much consequence. Good thing I mentioned that I'm breastfeeding!

So my eyes are fine and I don't need new glasses. Or "glack-is" as Elise used to call them.

IUD Update

Still not pregnant. So far so good.

For about 12 days after the IUD was inserted I had some bleeding. Not as heavy as a period but more blood than just a little bit of spotting. I called my OBGYN's office and the nurse said that so long as I wasn't soaking through a maxipad or having a lot of cramps, it was okay. Some spotting is common. I'd classify my condition as "light and constant bleeding" rather than spotting, but whatever. I decided to give it a few more days and fortunately the bleeding stopped.

I've had some minor spotting a couple of times since then. Apparently spotting within the first 3 months after the device is inserted is normal.

Overall, though, (assuming I never get pregnant again) I'm totally happy with my IUD.

I keep having dreams about being pregnant. I think it's because I've never before used a form of birth control that didn't require me to actively plan its use. You have to buy condoms, you have to take pills, you have to chart the calendar method. Now I don't have to think about any of that. But my brain is like, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! You can't just have sex without thinking about your birth control! You're probably pregnant already, you dummy!"

So. Cons: cost a fair chunk of change up front, caused a little bit of bleeding, and caused stress dreams. Pros: no more pregnancies, no more babies, no more stretchmarks.

Strolling

Clark had his first stroller ride today. He loved it. He laughed and smiled when we put him in the stroller. Then he slept for most of the ride around the mall. Which was good, because we let the three big kids run loose. They did pretty well-- didn't run too far ahead or lag too far behind. People stared at us with three toddlers and a baby in a stroller-- but let them stare. The kids mostly just trotted along and yelled happily at each other. Until the end of our walk when they all found it incredibly funny to pretend they had tripped, causing them to tumble and roll across the ground. No amount of, "Get up. The floor is dirty! Yucky! Yucky!" was going to stop that giggle-fest. Sometimes their silliness just has to peter out on its own.

Imagination!

Elise is developing a great imagination. It becomes most obvious at the kitchen table. Her fresh spinach has become balloons. Her cheese has been chomped into the rough shape of a camel. Her crackers are often trucks or trains. Her playdoh was a horse the other day. It's wonderful to watch her play.

No Kiss; Eyes

Today, for the first time, Elise wiped off one of my kisses.

:_(

Also, Clark's eyes are green now. (Will they keep changing? I can't wait to find out!)

Weight Check; Talking Points

1. Just weighed Clark. An even 17 lbs, putting him in the 93rd percentile for weight.

2. Elise is getting fancy with her talking lately. She was pretending the other night that her fresh spinach leaves (round leaf with a little stem attached) were balloons. She warned them not to "run away in a sky" and "bumpa head."

Tonight she told me, "I need hot soup. I cold." Makes perfect sense. Then I thought about how she's not even 2 years old yet and I've never given her hot anything to make her warm. She had no context for the idea that if you eat something hot it will warm you up. She came up with that on her own.

We also had a discussion about tails today. She was looking at a toy frog and asked, "Tail?"

"No, frogs don't have tails."

"Baby Clark tail?"

"No, Baby Clark doesn't have a tail." (I thought this might turn into a penis conversation, but fortunately she took it in another direction.)

"Elisey tail?"

"Nooooo. Elise doesn't have a tail."

"I DO have tail! I DO have tail!"

"Um. Okay. Show me. Where is your tail?"

Elise twisted around and pointed to her lower back. "Above buns!" Giggle, giggle, giggle. She's crazy.

In the Land of Giants

i've recently measured all of the kids' heights. assuming my measurements are accurate and assuming that the website where i input their information into a growth chart is accurate, here are the results:

henry: 81st percentile

elise: 44th percentile

georgia: 83rd percentile

clark: 85th percentile

the funny thing is that elise and georgia are very close in age and their height isn't that different, either, but those small amounts apparently make a big difference on growth charts. i guess elise takes after her mommy in the height department.

That's How He Rolls

Clark rolled over today! Back to belly. It took a tremendous effort and he screamed and cried, then he got his weight over his little shoulder and finally landed on his tummy and was all happy and relieved.

Then I cried.

Like a baby. I held him and cried. Things start happening faster and faster now. Soon he'll be biting me and running away from me in public. I know how this works. So I just wanted to cuddle the last bit of newborn-ness out of him and hold it in my heart forever.

*mommy teeeeeeeeeeeeeeears*

He's 15 weeks old today. Good work, baby boy!

***********************************************************************
Edited to add:

OH. MY. GAWD.

So I was just wondering how old Elise was when she rolled over for the first time. Since I obsessively write everything down in this blog, I thought to myself, "I know you aren't supposed to compare your kids. Every child is different. Blah blah blah. But I'm going to look this up in the most nonjudgmental way possible. Curiosity. Nothing more."

So check this out : here

It's a crazy coincidence! Elise rolled over on her 15 week birthday and so did Clark! Isn't that wacky!?!?

Clark's World

Clark has discovered his toes. He held on to them quite a bit today. At one point he was lying on his back holding his toes in one hand and sucking on the thumb of the other hand. It was, like, the quintessential baby move. Insanely cute.

He's also developed a strange new habit. Whenever I put Clark in his car seat lately he makes this AAAAAH AAAAAH AAAAH noise. It's not crying or yelling but it certainly isn't a happy noise. Grunting sort of. Almost like he's trying to poop. I don't know what it's all about. I made sure that his seat straps aren't too tight and his clothes aren't bunched up funny or anything. My guess is that he's basically saying, "Goddamnit, lady. The car seat again? Really? Do you not know that I hate riding in the car? Just wait until I have teeth. Then I'll show you who's boss."

Baby Classes

We have all of the big kids in classes right now. Elise takes music class, Georgia takes dance class, and Henry takes gymnastics. They love their classes. I want to expose them to new experiences, new concepts, and I also want them to have some time to do something cool that's their own special thing. Husband takes Henry and Georgia to their classes and I take Elise to hers.

It's hard to tell at their age exactly what they're learning. Just the very most basic basics. Sometimes you see a biography about someone famous for their skill and it'll say, "She's been playing golf since she was two years old..." or whatever and part of me thinks it's cool. But the other part of me wonders if that kid was forced into sticking with something they really didn't want to do. I don't want to be the kind of parent that forces their kid to practice violin for 3 hours every day just so they can be the star of their middle school orchestra. But I do want my children to learn that putting in the work to learn how to do something will yield rewards-- not everything comes naturally and sometimes you just have to practice, practice, practice. I'm not very good at knowing that. If I can't do something right the first time, I'm very prone to giving up. Maybe I can help my children avoid having that personality defect.

Clap to the beat, Elise! Dance with airplane arms, Georgia! Walk like a crab, Henry! Hopefully you'll be better people for it.

Hands and Feet

Clark totally discovered his hands today. He was looking and looking at them. Holding them together and pulling them apart. He also kept grabbing his pant legs and pulling his legs up in the air. So much to do! Hello, Clark the Explorer!

Clark got his first pair of shoes tonight. I only got them because it's kind of cold and I wanted to make sure that his feet are well covered. Little baby sneakers. He's going to look so cute.

All of the kids got new shoes tonight. The big kids blow through shoes like nobody's business.

Elise has been wearing a pair of silly pink cowboy boots nonstop for months. She loves them. So tonight when we had to go get new shoes, I showed her the options she had for boots in her size. Surprisingly, she passed over a pair of pink boots for some camouflage work boots. From one extreme to the other. From pink to camo. One thing about Elise is that she is completely unpredictable.

You've Got a What In Your What?

Yesterday in the car Elise started yelling.

"Lizard in tummy! Lizard in tummy!"

She was very upset. Sort of crying and kicking around in her seat. I have no idea what she was talking about. I wondered at first if she saw a lizard in the car, but then I settled on the idea that her tummy must have felt funny and somehow she believed something was moving around inside of her belly.

Then tonight, just before bed...

"Butterfly in vulva! Butterfly in vulva!"

What the what?! She's a weird kid.

Elise Today

Elise's ear infection is gone. Yay! And she now weighs 25 pounds.

On the way home from the doctor's office, an ambulance drove by with its lights and siren on.

"Siren?!"

"Yes, that's an ambulance. It's going to the hospital. Someone got a boo boo."

Pause. Then, "Baby in tummy?"

"Maybe. Someone might have a baby in their tummy." (I guess hospitals make her think of babies being born.)

"Mommy baby in tummy?"

"No! No, no, no. No baby in Mommy's tummy."

"Baby Clark baby in tummy?"

"No, Clark doesn't have a baby in his tummy. I guess you didn't know this, but only girls can have babies in their tummy. Maybe one day you'll have a baby in your tummy. If you want one. It's okay if you don't. But maybe you will. Do you want a baby in your tummy one day?"

Very flat tone and emphatic voice, looking right into my eyes in the rear view mirror: "No."

Also, Elise has her first little mole. A tiny brown speck on her tummy. She calls it her sparkle. Her sparkle! Sometimes I could die from her cuteness.

Clark's First Dentist Visit

I had my first post-baby dental cleaning today. Husband watched Elise at home, but I brought Clark with me. I could tell that the dental hygienist was less than thrilled that I had my 3 month old with me.

"What are you going to do with him while I clean your teeth?"

"He can just sit in his car seat. He's a good baby. He might even fall asleep."

He didn't fall asleep. Lately, if there's something new to look at then Clark will stay awake to observe all of the goings on. So he ended up sitting in my lap during the cleaning. He was all smiley and giggly and liked the mechanical sound of the polisher toothbrush thingy that they clean your teeth with at a dentist's office. He was no trouble at all. Just sat there looking cute.

So take that, grumpy dental hygienist lady. Just because your grumpy old self had grumpy babies doesn't mean that MY baby will fuss and cry out in public.

6 to 9 Month

Clark has officially outgrown all of his 3 to 6 month clothes and is now wearing size 6 to 9 months. He weighs over 16 lbs. I think his growth has slowed down a little bit, though. So maybe next time he has a doctor's appointment he won't be at the tippy top of the growth chart.

Meanwhile, he is right this second wearing some jammies that Elise wore while she was 8 months old. I know this because they're Halloween themed.

Choke A Baby

Today while Elise was eating a snack of goldfish crackers, I had my back turned to her while I folded laundry. All of a sudden she shouts, "Boo boo cracker!" and I turn around to see her drooling like crazy. She was drooling, her eyes were all red, and then she started coughing. She made terrible retching noises a couple of times. She was choking on a stupid goldfish cracker.

My first inclination was to start smacking her on the back, but when we called 911 that time that she turned out to have croup, the operator said not to hit her on her back and instead try to let her cough out whatever might be in her throat on her own. So I stood there watching Elise cough and cry for a few seconds while I told her, "It's okay! Cough! Cough!"

Then she said, "Pick up!" So I took her out of her highchair and sat her on my lap. She was able to talk and cry, so I knew she was getting air. I gave her her milk. She took a sip, clearly had a hard time forcing down something in her throat, but then looked at me and said, "All gone!"

Yikes. Scary.

THEN

THEN-- get this. Husband walks in the house this evening after picking Henry and Georgia up from school and says, "Henry almost choked today. Like to death. A teacher had to give him the Heimlich maneuver." He put some video game token in his mouth and either tried to swallow it or sucked it into his throat somehow.

What the hell is going on? How weird that Henry and Elise both choked today.

Also, not long after Husband got home, Georgia smacked Clark in the head with the corner of a book. That has nothing to do with choking. Just another crazy baby injury. Clark got a big old red mark from it.

Anyway, the good news is that everyone's still alive.

Mr Sandman

Elise and Henry were a handful this evening. Tonight, after the kids were all sound asleep and Husband and I had decompressed by watching an episode of Mad Men, I said to Husband, "Sorry tonight was a crappy night."

"It's okay. That's why God invented sleep."

"Sort of like a reset button?"

"No. So our KIDS go to sleep."

Amen to that.

Pooms

Henry and Georgia have issues with constipation. Consequently, all of the kids get prunes every night after dinner, like a dessert. It helps. And they LOVE them. Henry and Georgia kind of say "pru" and Elise calls them "pooms."

I do not like prunes, but I'm the only one. Even Husband likes them. But he also likes pimento cheese spread and orange marmalade. It's like sharing a refrigerator with a 70 year old southern lady.

Speech Delays

husband and i recently had henry's delays evaluated by an outside source that had never met henry before the testing. we wanted to make sure that henry's current therapists are correct in their diagnosis of his developmental issues. we wanted a second opinion.

happily, it was determined that he is only delayed in the area of speech. henry had other delays when he first came to live with us, so this is a wonderful improvement. no matter what happens in the future, whether henry stays with us forever or goes to live somewhere else, we can be glad to know that we helped put his development on track and gave him a better chance at success in the future.

now husband and i are focusing on ways to improve his speech. i know about 4 or 5 families who have children with speech delays or a family member who works in that field, so i've been exploring our options and working toward creating a plan for getting henry more help in overcoming his issues. he is making progress right now, but i just want to make sure that we're doing everything that we can.

Dinner Menu

I like having the kids help out in the kitchen. In little ways. I ask them to help me stir ingredients together or pour ingredients in to bowls, all with my help, of course. In reality it slows down the whole process, but I think that it's important that they learn about food and how to prepare it.

Tonight I asked Elise, "Would you like to help me make dinner?"

"I gonna make dinner. Raisins. Crackers."

Oh. Okay. Good thing I'm not very hungry, I guess.

Too Much

today elise combined "i love you, too" and "i love you so much" and she kept telling clark and me, "i love you too much."

Dolla Dolla Bills, Ya'll

HO. LY. SHIT.

If we didn't have insurance, Clark's two week RSV stay in the hospital would have cost us $74,000. The amount we will actually pay is still up for debate-- getting that straightened out. But it will be less than 1/74th of the bill.

3 Months Old!

Happy 3 month birthday, Baby Clark!!!

Such an amazing little Babu! I'm the happiest mommy ever.

Also, Clark peed in the potty for the first time today. I don't think I'll have time to be as gung-ho about E.C. with Clark as I was with Elise, but we'll work it into our routine as much as we can.

Manly

Clark has started cooing and babbling a lot lately. It's cute to watch him move his little lips around and try out different noises. He's especially fond of the o sound.

I swear that his voice is deeper than Elise's was at the same age. Not his cry so much, but his "speaking" voice. Am I imagining that because he's a boy? I really think it's true, though.

(Another thing: When I asked Elise what she wanted for breakfast this morning, she told me "pickle sauce..." ???)

Baby Poops

Clark has separate pees and poos now.

For the first couple of months, my babies seemed to poop every time they peed. I think that all newborn babies are like that. But I don't know how it works, really. Maybe there is actually a somewhat constant stream of poop and pee and it just looks like they're happening at the same time because both are in the diaper every time I change the babies. Or maybe baby humans are like birds, where the poops and pees are practically the same thing for some reason. I mean, when all you're eating is milk, how specific does your body need to be when it's filtering waste?

Anyhow, for a few weeks now, Clark has been having lots of diapers that are just wet. Instead of pooping, like, 8 times a day, he poops 2 or 3 times a day. And almost never during the night. It's nice to have some not-poopy diapers sometimes.

You're growing up, little guy!

Cookie Tradition

Husband and I started a New Year's Day tradition for our family a few years ago-- we make cookies. Nothing fancy, just something fun to do. This year we made Preacher Cookies. Super easy, but surprisingly tasty.

• 1/2 cup (one stick) butter
• 2 cups white sugar
• 1/2 cup milk
• 4 tablespoons unsweetened cocoa powder
• 1/2 cup peanut butter
• 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 3 cups quick cooking oats

1. Bring butter, sugar, milk and cocoa to boil. Let boil for exactly 1 minute and 30 seconds. Don't start the timer until it begins to boil.
   
2. Remove from heat, stir in vanilla and peanut butter. Then stir in oats.
3. Drop large tablespoons of mix onto wax paper laid on top of dish towels or
   newspaper. Let cool on counter top, peel from paper and turn over to finish drying.
4. Store in closed container.

Yum!