Turns Out I Was Wrong

Even when Husband and I decided to stop trying to avoid pregnancy, I never thought that I'd actually get pregnant.

It seems silly to say that now, of course. But you know how there are some things that you just can't imagine happening to you? They're incomprehensible. Like, I can IMAGINE myself winning the lottery, even though I don't play. But I can't wrap my brain around the idea of what it would really be like to be a bank robber. Its not in my nature. Its not something I could picture myself doing.

I used to have the same sort of incomprehensible feeling regarding pregnancy. I've always wanted a family. But having a family and pushing infants through my pelvis aren't necessarily the same thing to me. I didn't think that my body would venture to undertake that challenge.

I mean, I'm 30. Just about everyone I know who has kids got pregnant accidentally. I sort of figured that if I hadn't gotten knocked up by now, it was because my body wasn't interested in getting pregnant. And I was fine with that.

To be honest, sometimes I still wonder if my body is really meant for pregnancy. Given my horrible morning sickness, I've thought on more than one occasion "maybe the reason that I never really wanted to get pregnant is because I'm just not cut out for it." The farther along that I get, though, the more surprised I am at the changes in my body and the way it's preparing and caring for the baby.

Its hard to imagine NOT being pregnant right now. Those little kicks that I feel seriously make my day. I'm really glad that Husband and I waited for as long as we did, but now feels like the perfect time to have a baby. Even though being pregnant is still sort of surreal-- I wake up almost every morning and am taken slightly aback with the realization that there's a baby growing inside of me-- I wouldn't change it for anything.