Counting Down

We are mere days away from our big move! About 90% of our house is packed and still I feel like I have a million things to do.

Blah blah blah... who cares about my problems?

Cute things the kids have said recently:

* Clark talks in full sentences, uses words like "I" and "my" and "mine," and occasionally busts out with words I didn't know he knew like "princess" (we have zero princess-culture in our house) or "unbuckle." He has amazing manners, says please and thank you, and even says "Bless you, Mommy" when I sneeze (which totally melts my heart). He's very quick to tell you "I don't like that" or "I don't want that." His favorite song is  "Barbara Ann" by the Beach Boys. And he has this thing about putting laundry baskets on his head and then, in a staccato, mechanical voice saying, "RO-BOT! RO-BOT! RO-BOT!"

* Henry has been doing awesome, awesome, awesome in school and speech therapy lately. All of a sudden, a bunch of things have just started clicking for him. He's getting really good at following complex directions, and in a matter of weeks he went from recognizing none of the letters of the alphabet by sight to recognizing all of them. BOOM!

* We read a Sleeping Beauty story a few weeks ago and Georgia LOVED it. Now every night when she climbs into bed she says to me, "Mommy! I'm Sleeping Booty!" I know I should probably correct her mistake, but it's so funny and cute to me that I don't say anything. Bad parenting? Maybe. But if she ever needs a cool pirate queen name, she's already one step ahead of the game.

* Elise continues to say something ridiculous every single day. Today's gem was, "Mommy. I don't like to poop. When I poop, my bottom smells like buffaloes."

Recent Goings On

We're moving soon. I can't believe all of the stuff I have to do. So much stuff. So many kids. So many kids' toys and clothes and beds and winter jackets all the jackets why do we have so many jackets???

To further complicate things, I got a part time job that will start immediately after we move. I haven't worked outside of the home in over three years. Three years, two months, five days and counting. I'm kind of excited. Except for the fact that the only clothes I currently own are sweat pants and t-shirts stained with random collections of bodily fluids. So I guess I should update my wardrobe a bit. Or at least get some nice earrings to distract from the visible straps of the sports bra that I like to wear every day.

I told Elise today that I would be starting a job once we move.

"You'll be working with Daddy?" (Because everyone on the planet who works must go to the same place, right?)

"No, a different place."

"Will there be other mommies?"

"Yeah, actually, there's another mommy there."

"It's called Mummy Tummies?"

"Are you asking if the place I'll be working at is called Mummy Tummies?"

Glassy-eyed stare for about 5 seconds straight. And then, "It was a joke, Mommy."

"Oh, I see. Since there's two mommies there, you wanted to know if we'll be working at a place called Mummy Tummies. That's a good joke, Elise!"

More staring. "Yeah. It was a good one."

Oh, well. Can't win them all.

Story of a Surprise Baby

I found out recently that someone I know had a baby. A surprise baby. An "I Didn't Even Know I Was Pregnant" baby.

I'm shocked.

Shocked.

This person was 7 months along when she found out she was pregnant. And then she went into labor early, about a month and a half later.

Can you IMAGINE?

Surprise! You're going to have a baby in less than three months.... Wait! How about you have that baby RIGHT NOW?

The new mommy has some medical issues with her lady parts that precluded her from realizing that something was out of the ordinary. I guess because everything that goes on down there is already out of the ordinary. Plus, she was told that she's probably infertile, so I suppose that a pregnancy wasn't even on her radar as a possibility.

She's not obese or anything. She's curvy, but not fat. I guess she didn't show much. Some people don't. I am NOT one of those people, by the way. But apparently she is.

Crazy.

Anyway, the baby was teeny tiny when it was born-- less than 5 lbs-- but relatively healthy and it went home from the hospital after just a few weeks in the NICU.

The only other person I've ever known to have a pregnancy progress without their knowledge was 4 months along when she found out. And I thought that was bonkers.

Congrats to the new family!

Hello, Again

Well, we closed on the house. Husband and I now own two houses, which sounds a lot fancier than it really is. 

Good god, I hope we can rent out our first house.

We've been packing and trying to get two houses ready for the big move and otherwise just generally trying to get our shit together. 

Rather than blabber on about how stressful my life is right now, how about some Elisey talk?

She's still hellbent on embarrassing me at every opportunity. Yesterday in the grocery store, Elise sent an old lady in the cereal aisle into a giggling fit when she kept loudly declaring that we are all out of "peenie butter." Not peanut butter. Peenie butter. Over and over again. Peenie butter peenie butter peenie butter.

Then today at story time at the library, while we were singing one of the regular songs which repeats, "Turn to your neighbor and say how do you do, how do you do, how do you do..." Elise decided to change the words and started scream-singing "Turn to your neighbor and say how do you POO?" 

She's an imp. I love her. But she's an imp.

Closing On the House Soon!

We're closing on our new house next week!!!

Very exciting. Also, there is no way I will ever get everything done that needs to get done before we move and I am currently caught in a rapidly cycling loop of frantically trying to organize and accomplish everything, and then curling myself into a ball on the floor and letting the panic melt into despair.

On top of the inevitable stress that comes with moving, my car broke today. Broke broke. I was driving and it just stopped working. The engine made some dying noises, my power steering went out, then my brakes felt funny. Yikes. I managed to get my car off the road (fortunately no one was too close in front of or behind me) and I called for roadside assistance. Husband came to pick me up, and of course he brought the kids. Their lucky day. They LOVE tow trucks, and the fact that it was OUR car on a tow truck was extra exciting.

Mommy, of course, was less happy about the situation.

Broken Table and a Warning

What happened today? Well, let's see...

Our kitchen table broke and I got pulled over by a cop while I had all 4 kids in the car.

By the way, I was not pulled over for speeding or running a red light or anything like that. The reason I was pulled over was technically not my fault and I was given a warning. Elise did ask, though, as I was stopping the car if I was going to jail.

Tomorrow will be a better day.

Cut, Cut, Smash

Clark had his first hair cut ever on Friday night. He had a little baby mullet, so I gathered up his wispy, softer-than-soft little hairs into a ponytail and snipped it off. I'm secretly trying to grow his hair long (not sure if Husband approves-- I'm not going to ask), but his bangs are so short that it all needs to even out, so trimming the back is a good step in the long-hair-plan. I saved the hair, of course. For now, it seems like the motherly, sentimental thing to do, but I'm pretty sure that in about 15 years I'll be stuffing it into a voodoo doll.

On Saturday, Clark got his first big boo-boo. He fell down when he was running on a sidewalk and skinned the crap out of his knee. It was quite bloody for a skinned knee. He cried, but he was over it within about two minutes and by the time we all made it back to the car to put antibiotic ointment on the cut, Clark was just annoyed that I wouldn't set him back down to play.

While I was washing Clark's knee off with some bottled water, Elise fell and scraped up her leg from her ankle (which got the worst of it) to almost all the way up to her knee. Unlucky day.

But the weekend injuries didn't stop there. Sunday was the worst.

On Friday Husband accidentally preheated the oven with a plastic container still inside. Plastic melted everywhere, got all over everything when Husband took the warped container out of the oven, and stunk up the house. We meant to clean the oven as soon as it cooled down, but then life happened and we kind of temporarily forgot the whole incident.

On Sunday I cooked chili for dinner and I decided at the last minute to bake some dinner rolls. When the oven beeped that it was done preheating, I flung open the oven door and was greeted with blast of toxic fumes. They floated right past my eyeglasses (or maybe THROUGH them, for all I know) and into my eyes. It burned like a motherfucker. I screamed, dropped to my knees, and hoped that I would be able to see whenever the next time is that I can convince my eyelids to open up despite the searing pain.

Husband ran in to help me, we washed my eyes out in the kitchen sink, and immediately started opening windows around the house. My eyes were watering like crazy, but I could still see, so that was reassuring. While I was in a back bedroom unfastening a window latch, I heard a sickening thud, Husband's voice, a pause, then Clark start screaming. Fuck! So I ran back into the living room to discover that Clark had walked into the front door while Husband was swinging it back and forth, trying to fan the fumes out of the house.

Clark's mouth was filling with blood and he had a CRAZY, pointy knot on the back of his head where he had fallen backwards and hit the ground. I started flipping out, as I am extremely not-calm when my kids get hurt, and decided to take him to the hospital. I was probably also hyper-emotional because I was still dealing with my own injury. It was just a bad situation, all around.

I got about half way there when Clark finally started to calm down, and I started to calm down, so I pulled over for a second to better assess the situation. Clark was clearly alert, hadn't thrown up, and when I shined a light in his eyes, his pupils constricted. So, probably not a concussion. His mouth was still bleeding, but all of his teeth were there and in the correct place, so probably no major dental problems. Clark's lip was swollen and puffy, but when I felt the back of his head the lump was already a bit smaller and less pointy. Okay. Okay. He's okay. I decided to go back home.

Clark got to eat vanilla ice cream and a bowl of frozen whipped cream for dinner, as he wouldn't let us put an ice pack on his lip and that was the best we could do. Today, the lump on the back of his head is much smaller, his lip looks normal, and there is hardly the faintest shadow of a bruise on his mouth.

About three times yesterday and then once today Clark said to me, "I mad!" (We teach the kids to say "I'm mad" instead of hitting each other or throwing a temper tantrum.) Each time I've said, "I'm sorry. Why are you mad?" and each time he's touched the back of his head and said, "Boo boo head!" Poor little guy. Very articulate for a 17 month old. I think his brain is working just fine.

Husband's really upset about the whole thing with Clark, as he feels responsible. It was an accident. And Clark won't even remember it.

Crazy weekend. Glad it's over.

Happy 4th Birthday, Henry!

Today was Henry's 4th birthday. He picked waffles for breakfast, which all of the kids were happy about. Right after breakfast, Husband and I gave Henry his birthday present-- a Spider-Man bike with training wheels. He was so happy. He did that is-it-really-mine? thing that little kids do, where he got a big smile on his face, then stood frozen for a few seconds, like he didn't know what to do next. but don't worry, he unfroze and then proceeded to ride his bike ALLLLLLL around the living room and down the hallway.

Henry went to school today, and Husband, Elise, Clark, and I brought cupcakes to his class during snack time. He enjoyed that a lot... but then got all weepy when it was time for us to leave. Dang. I hate that kind of guilt. Don't-leave-me guilt is the worst.

Henry chose a dinner of macaroni and cheese and hot dogs... I added peas to the menu. I love how unbelievably predictable the kids are when I ask them what they want to eat for meals on their birthday. 

Happy birthday, buddy! I'm so glad I got to share this birthday with you as your Mommy. I love you!

Where Has the Time Gone?

Aaaaaaah! How did so much time pass since my last post? Everything's a blur.

The past few days:

* We had a birthday party for Henry, Elise, and Georgia this past weekend. Their birthdays are all really close together. I asked them if they wanted their own parties this year or one party together and they wanted one together. Cute. That's probably the last time they'll ever want to have a group birthday party. But it was nice. It was at this kiddie play place where they had a bounce house, trampoline, swings dangling from the ceiling... all kinds of stuff. They even played the song "Who Let the Dogs Out," so you know it was a REAL party.

* The kids got lots of great birthday presents: toys, clothes, books, puzzles. They're totally loving life right now. And I'm trying to figure out where all of this stuff will go.

* We are almost done with buying our new house! We should get the closing date any day now.

* We took the kids to the new house this weekend. Our real estate agent couldn't meet us, but we went to the house anyway. One of the locks somewhere on the house is not secured, so we went in. Just a little trespassing with a tribe of toddlers. Or is that breaking and entering? Either way, who cares? I wanted to show the kids their new rooms. They're totally excited.

Elise's 3 Year Old Check Up

Elise had her 3 year old doctor's check up today. Her eyesight is spot on. She is 36 1/4 inches tall and weighs 30 1/4 lbs, which makes her in about the 25th percentile for height and about the 50th percentile for weight.

I asked the doctor about the discrepancy in her height and weight percentiles, because Elise doesn't look overweight at all. He said, no, she's clearly not. In fact, her BMI is within the normal range. So nothing to worry about.

Good!

Baby Man and the Bro Grabs; Toilet Troubles

Clark gives the manliest hugs. He throws one arm around my shoulder and heartily slaps my back three or four times. Like we're both 40 year old dudes, instead of mother and baby. Where did he get that from?

Also, tonight Clark pooped on the potty for the first time! Yay! He then immediately fell off the toilet and bumped his head on the ground. So what should have been an amazingly positive potty training experience turned into a potty trauma experience.  I'm sure that set us back months, and therefore effectively counts as the opposite of potty training. Goddammit.

Healthy Breakfast #4

I found another relatively healthy breakfast for the kids, bringing my new total up to four. My hungry little babies like oatmeal, but that instant oatmeal stuff is super bad for you. I found a recipe for steel cut oats that can be cooked in a crock pot, overnight.

Here's the thing about crock pots, in case you aren't familiar with using them: the food doesn't taste bad-- it's always better than just passable-- but it will never be delicious. The food cooked in a slow cooker always tastes a bit bland to me. Like some of the flavor was slow cooked right out of it. So what you gain in convenience you sacrifice in taste.

That said, this recipe for apple-cinnamon oatmeal is fairly yummy. Not perfect. But better than any instant version you'll get. And healthier, too.

Here's a link to the original recipe with pictures: here

And if you don't want to click anything or look at pictures:

Ingredients

• 2 apples, peeled, cored, cut into 1/2-inch pieces (2-1/2 to 3 cups chopped)
• 1-1/2 cups fat-free milk (or substitute non-diary alternative like almond milk)
• 1-1/2 cups water
• 1 cup uncooked steel-cut oats
• 2 tablespoons brown sugar (or substitute maple syrup or other desired sweetener)
• 1-1/2 tablespoons butter, cut into 5-6 pieces (optional)
• 1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
• 1 tablespoon ground flax seed
• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• Optional garnishes: chopped nuts, raisins, maple syrup, additional milk or butter

Directions

Coat inside of 3-1/2 quart (or larger) slow cooker with cooking spray. Add all ingredients (except optional toppings) to slow cooker. Stir, cover, and cook on low for approx. 7 hours (slow cooker times can vary). Spoon oatmeal into bowls; add optional toppings, if desired. Store leftovers in refrigerator. Freezes well.

I doubled this recipe and cooked it in my 5.5 quart slow cooker with no problem-- everything fit and it cooked  fine. Every crock pot is different, though, so you'll have to watch the length of time you cook it for the first time you cook this recipe. I cooked mine for the full 7 hours, but it was starting to burn around the edges. I'll probably check it after 6.5 hours next time.

With this recipe doubled, we have enough for two breakfasts and still have some left over. Clark especially likes this oatmeal.

Happy 3rd Birthday, Goosey!

Elise had a very nice 3rd birthday today. She picked out the day's menu, so it was pancakes, blueberries, and orange juice for breakfast. She got to open her present in the morning and she was delighted to see that she got the roller skates she's been asking for forever. Also, elbow and knee pads, and protective gloves. Gotta stay safe.

After breakfast we all went to a local historical site (Elise wore her roller skates) and got the pleasant surprise that there was an archery demonstration today. Everyone got to shoot some arrows and Clark even got to hold a bow. Of course, Elise and Henry and Georgia each needed some help, but they all wanted to try it and that's the most important thing. My adventurous babies. It was fun!

Peanut butter and jelly for lunch. Elise is very predictable that way. Then after lunch and a nap, we made her birthday cake. The kids all got to help, even Clark, and they were excited to dump ingredients in the bowl and help hold the electric mixer.

We had pizza for dinner, with birthday cake and Sprite for dessert. We never have soda. Ever. Except for our trip one time to the Coca Cola museum in Atlanta, but that was literally the only time the kids have had soda. Getting soda today was an extra treat. The girls didn't even like it. Only Henry drank his soda.

After dinner, Elise wanted to watch "The Lorax," which they've seen probably about six times now. But the kids watched it from beginning to end. They really like it.

Elise said it was a good birthday. I'm so happy.

Happy birthday, Elise! I love you so much!

Enough with the Poop Jokes

Elise continues to think that poop is the funniest thing on the planet and does her very best to insert mention of it into every conversation possible. The other day as we were leaving the speech therapist's office:

Receptionist: Bye, Henry! Bye, Elise! See you soon!

Elise: Bye! See you... POOP!

And she runs away laughing.

I try not to react to most of her shenanigans, but she seems to intuitively know what's inappropriate. At the pharmacy a day or two later, Elise caressed her shirt and said in her loudest voice that was just barely not yelling, "Mommy! I have big nipples! I have HUGE nipples." She doesn't, by the way. But that didn't stop her from rubbing her nipples through her shirt, dancing up and down the aisle we were in, and singing, "Look at my big, big nipples! Look at my big, BIG nipples! Look at my BIG, BIG NIPPLES!!!"

I'm cataloging this stuff. And then as soon as she becomes a teenager, I vow to return each and every one of these little favors. Ten more years until her 13th birthday. I can't wait...

Healthy Breakfasts

I've been on a little bit of a health kick lately. Nothing crazy. I'm not trying to do a complete overhaul of my lifestyle or anything-- I just want to make some small, permanent changes.

One thing that I've been working on is finding some healthy, natural breakfasts. Frozen waffles are sooooo tempting when I'm trying to get four kids ready and out the door in the mornings. But I know I can do better than that. I have three solid options so far.

#1) Scrambled eggs. I've added parsley to the eggs as well as basil, both of which the kids liked. Turns out parsley is really good for you, by the way.

#2) I went on a huge search for the healthiest, most natural boxed cereal I could find that the kids would eat. There are plenty of healthy breakfast cereals, but not many that the kids would take more than one or two bites of. I tried a few different kinds, and ultimately got lucky with Cascadian Farm organic Honey Nut O's. They're like Honey Nut Cheerios, but healthier. And more expensive. Of course.

#3) Smoothies! Here's the recipe that we tried last weekend and the kids loved:

• 1 1/4 cups orange juice
• 1 ripe medium banana, peeled and sliced
• 1 cup frozen blueberries, blackberries or raspberries
• 1/2 cup silken tofu
• 2 ice cubes, crushed

Just blend it up. Add sugar if you want, but we didn't think it needed it. We used raspberries this time, but I think that next time I make it I'll use raspberries and blueberries. This recipe makes 3 servings. Here's the link to the original: http://www.eatingwell.com/recipes/banana_berry_smoothie.html

Clark Has Ear Infections

Poor little Babu. Ear infections in both ears. He's been super congested with a yucky cough for over a week now. I finally took him to the doctor today, as it became obvious the problem wasn't going to resolve itself. I wasn't expecting ear infections; his cough sounds so bad I was only thinking he might have a respiratory infection. His chest is clear, but his ears look terrible. He'll be on a round of antibiotics (not amoxicillin!) for the next 10 days.

I always feel like a terrible mother when I take my kids to the doctor and then I'm told that they have something wrong with them that I wasn't expecting. I feel like I missed something. Clark didn't have a fever, he wasn't pulling on his ears... nothing like that. He's been cranky, but I figured that was just because he's so congested.

Hopefully he'll start feeling better soon.

Being Busy, Staying Healthy

So busy, busy, busy. I'm still doing at-home writing assignments to earn some extra money (I think I mentioned that before), so most of my "free" time is spent working on those projects. I'm earning a couple of hundred extra dollars a month, so it's worth the effort. Kids are expensive, yo. Especially four of them. What sucks about the writing assignments is that I have even less down time for myself now.

Also, I've been working out at home most nights lately, which takes me about 30 minutes at this point. It's not much, I know, but it's better than nothing, right? My workouts are also cutting into the time I used to have to relax and zone out. I'd rather be working out than just sitting around, I guess, but I still haven't gotten over that horrible hump that I always face when I first start exercising again and reached the point where it no longer feels like a giant hassle and just feels like a regular part of my routine. I'll get there. Soon, I hope.

I've been on a bit of a health kick lately. I've made lots of changes to our diet at home and I'm still working out ways to improve our food choices. More on that later. I have some kind of weird purple potato roasting in my oven right now that I have to attend to...

New House Update

The bank for the house we put an offer on has accepted our short sale price. This is good, but there are still a lot of steps before closing, so no celebrating yet.

Next up is the inspection. Our inspector will look the house over next week and report back. Depending on what he (she?) finds, everything either continues according to plan, we offer a lower price based on the new findings, or we back out of the sale completely.

I guess this will be an interesting week, no matter what the results of the inspection turn to out to be.

New Shoes... Again

The kids all got new shoes today. Current shoe sizes:

Henry = 13 (He has the biggest feet! He's still only 3 years old!!!)
Elise= 8
Georgia= 10
Clark= 6

Brush Your Kids' Teeth, People

I had a dental cleaning today. The hygienist told me that I had the cleanest teeth she'd seen all day and with the least amount of build up. Then she said, "And I've seen several kids today. So that's saying something."

Look. I bust my ass to take care of my babies but I do a shit job of taking care of myself. If I was the star patient at the dentist's office today, something is seriously wrong with the world.

Now I Understand Why You're a Little Brat

There's this kid who has speech therapy on one of the same days as Henry. In fact, he and Henry are often in a group session together. The kid is a total brat. I hate to say that about a 4 year old, but he is.

Every day that he's there at speech therapy, he comes running into the waiting room and immediately starts destroying things. He grabs toys out of other kids' hands, throws stuff across the room, dumps kids out of the chairs they're sitting in, tries to pick up babies, etc, etc, etc. All the while, his mother busies herself talking to the receptionist and attempting to not notice what her son is doing.

At first I didn't say anything to the kid because his mother is right there and I didn't want to cross any boundaries. But eventually it became apparent that his mother is not interested in disciplining him and so, as there is clearly no boundary to cross, I started to try to keep his behavior somewhat in check whenever he's around my kids. I mean, every once in a while his mom will turn and look at him and snap his name and threaten to "tell his daddy" or whatever, but for the most part she doesn't say anything and he certainly doesn't listen to her.

Recently, we arrived to speech therapy a few minutes late and this kid's mom was standing outside smoking a cigarette. I thought that they must have already taken the kids back to their therapy session and I was feeling disappointed that we were so late. But we walked into the waiting room and there was that bratty kid, literally trying to snatch a cell phone out of one of the other mother's hands while she tensely tried to explain that it is not his phone, it is her phone, and he cannot have it to play with. Bratty kid then ran over to a one year old baby and tried to dump her out of the chair she was sitting in.

I was super pissed. What kind of mother leaves her 4 year old unsupervised (or expecting the other parents in the vicinity to supervise her child for her) while she stands outside and smokes a cigarette? Especially if you know your kid has behavioral problems? She couldn't wait 5 minutes for the therapist to come and get her son for his therapy session? She had to smoke a cigarette RIGHT THEN? I was about to go talk to the receptionist and ask her to talk to the kid's mother and let her know that she needs to better supervise her son before his session begins, but right then all of the therapists came out and started to gather up the kids and there was a moment or two of chaos.

In all of the hubbub, the bratty kid (intentionally) pushed Clark over and Clark started crying. As I bent to pick Clark up, the mom came wandering in. She looked 100% high. She looked at her son with a droopy-eyed half smile and instinctively knew that he had done something to make Clark cry. "Did you hurt that baby?" And then she turns to me, "He's such a bully. A big ol' bully." And then she starts laughing. Her front teeth have always looked normal to me, but I could see some of her side teeth for the first time and they looked black and rotted. Meth mouth? That's my guess.

So now it all makes sense. And now I feel kind of sorry for the kid. Wasn't expecting that. Ugh.

Clark Loves Pikachu

Today Clark saw a short .gif of the cartoon character Pikachu, smiling and looking all happy. Clark went gaga. He started giggling and waving at my computer and saying, "Hi, bear!" Oh, he laughed and cooed at the cartoon forever. Then he started saying, "Cute! Bear's cute! Hi, bear! Cuuuuute!"

It was adorable. Clark's first crush.

Poop SOS

Poor Clarky was constipated today. He was having an especially rough time after his nap. He sat next to me on the couch, pushing and straining, and he was looking right into my eyes, crying, and saying, "Help me. Mommy. Help me."

It was heartbreaking. Seriously sad.

I worked his little legs back and forth and eventually a box of apple juice seemed to do the trick. He was a happy little baby after that was all done.

Movies for Our Toddlers

We've been watching movies with the kids lately. They don't quite have the stamina yet to sit through an entire movie, but if we break the movies into two sessions, they do all right.

The girls super love The Lorax. We've watched it twice recently. Georgia especially enjoys it and talks about it a lot. We've also watched Brave, Wall-E, and some movies featuring Tinkerbell. I can live without the Tinkerbell movies, but Husband and I have liked watching the other movies with the kiddos. It's fun to have "family movie time."

We've had a lot of failed movie attempts, too. Happy Feet didn't quite hold their attention. Older Disney movies like Dumbo and The Aristocats are too mature for them, with lots of talking and long places without enough action. It's pretty hit or miss, and we start every movie with the awareness that the kids might not be into it.

Elise is obsessed with Alice in Wonderland. She loves it as much as Georgia loves The Lorax. Maybe we'll watch Alice in Wonderland as a family for our next movie night. Oooh! Or the live-action one... do you remember that version? I think that Gene Wilder and Whoopi Goldberg are in it. Yes. That might be fun. Or a total bust. No telling with these kids.

BAM! Georgia is Potty Trained!

Like Elise and Henry, lately Georgia as been sleeping in just undies and no diaper. The first night we simply forgot to put a diaper on her, but she woke up dry and used the potty like a big girl. Husband and I figured it was a fluke, but we decided to test that theory and let Georgia sleep in just undies a second night. Still dry. A third night. Still dry.

So there you have it, folks. Three kids fully potty trained.

Do you have any idea how much money that saves us every month? I'm rich!!!

Elise's First Diaper-Free Night, Etc.

Elise went all night last night with just undies and no diaper on and no accidents. Yay! Two kids fully potty trained. I don't think my little heart can handle all of this excitement.

Georgia is still doing great with the potty training. She had an accident this weekend, but in fairness to her, she asked to go potty and we just couldn't get there quite in time. Bound to happen sooner or later.

In non-potty-related news, Clark is becoming a picky breakfast eater. He barely eats breakfast most days. This morning he refused to eat his English muffin by putting it on his head and insisting it was a hat.

"Clark, eat your food."

"Hat?"

"No, eat your English muffin."

"Hat."

"It's not a hat, it's an English muffin. Please eat."

"HAT!"

"Fine. Eat your hat."

"No."

More Potty Training Progress

Excellent news from the potty training front!

#1) Henry has not had a single nighttime accident since we took his pull-ups off full time. Boom. Potty training 100% complete!

#2) Elise has been keeping herself dry at nighttime, too. We've been talking to her about just wearing undies to bed at night. I think we'll try it soon. A few more dry nights in a row, and it'll be go time.

#3) Georgia went all day at school yesterday in undies with no accidents. I don't know what they use to motivate her at school, but at home, she loves getting stickers for going potty. Is it a reward or a bribe? WHO CARES! She's peeing and pooping on the potty!

I now only have ONE baby in diapers during the day! ONE BABY! This is amazing.

Another Update

I've been doing some small writing projects to earn a little bit of extra money, so I haven't had much time to blog lately. Here are a few things, off the top of my head, that have been going on as of late:

* Clark has his bottom left molar now and the right one is still trying to poke through. These bottom molars are giving him trouble. His first big teething problem, requiring middle-of-the-night Tylenol and extreme patience from Mommy and Daddy. Hopefully we'll see that right-side molar soon.

* In typical Georgia-fashion, she was late to perform, but now that she's committed to it, she is killing it at potty-training. She's always been slow to do things-- she was late walking, talking, using her cup with no lid-- but then when she decides to do it, she goes all out and suddenly just DOES it. The other day she said, "Mommy, I don't want to pee in my diaper anymore. Now I wear undies and pee-pee on the potty." And that was it.

She's not quite ready for no diaper in public yet. I'm just not confident in her new-found ability to control her bladder. But we're rapidly moving in that direction. Awesome!

* Still waiting to hear back from the house seller's bank to see if our offer was approved. It's been over 6 weeks. Just waiting. Not so patiently. Hoping we'll get to move soon.

What's Going On Lately

Been busy. Here's a list of a few things that have been going on with the kids lately:

* Clark's bottom molars are coming in. They've been giving him some trouble at night. Poor fussy baby. Poor tired Mommy.

* We're still working on potty training with Georgia. She's slowly, slowly, slowly getting it. Yesterday and today she peed in her underwear three times each day. Three times! The only way we can get her to even make any effort to use the potty is to put undies on her, though. If she has a diaper (or pull-up) on, she doesn't even try, she just uses the diaper.

Georgia did pee on the potty once yesterday, and then today she peed about 3 times and even pooped twice. So we're making progress. It's just annoying to mop pee off of the floor every few hours, when she doesn't make it to the potty.

* Henry hasn't had a single nighttime peeing accident since we took the pull-ups off at night. Woo hoo! (I probably just jinxed myself...)

You Talk Pretty

Georgia has been discharged from speech therapy!

When I brought the kids to therapy today, I was told the good news. I didn't even know the therapists' office was considering discharging her, but apparently Georgia was re-tested recently and scored solidly within normal limits in each of the test categories.

So exciting! Gigi, I'm so proud of you! All of your hard work has really paid off!

Talk With Your Eyes

I got my January-is-eye-check-up-month eye exam today. No major changes. That's good, because I just bought new glasses. Stupid me. But I wanted to use up the last bit of money in our flexible spending account (because if you don't spend it, you lose it) and I had to use it before my eye exam was scheduled, so I just went ahead and got new glasses and hoped for the best. Luckily, it worked out.

My eye doctor is really nice. Young. She has a two year old son, a little younger than Elise and Georgia. We were chatting during my exam and it turns out that her son goes to speech therapy at the same place Henry and Georgia go. It was actually really nice to talk to her about our kids' speech delays. It's not like I meet a lot of other moms with kids in speech therapy. The parents that I do chat with in the speech therapy waiting room often have kids that are in vastly different situations-- the kids are much older, the kids have had a head injury, the kids are mentally challenged. My eye doctor's son is in the same situation as Henry and Georgia; he's had chronic ear infections and it's impacted his speech.

So I got my eyes checked out AND had a few minutes to "talk shop" with another mommy. Yay!

Sun Damage But No Skin Cancer

As fair-skinned as I am, and for as many blistering sunburns as I've had in my life, I probably shouldn't have waited so long to see a dermatologist. I went to one today to get a routine checkup. I figured it was time, and Husband was encouraging me to go.

Everything checked out okay. So far so good, anyway. The nurse practitioner that I saw asked me at one point if I had any spots that I was concerned about and wanted her to look at specifically.  I said, "No. Not yet, anyway." She said, "Yeah. Not YET. As fair as you are, definitely not YET." Then we both laughed. I'm not sure why I laughed, in retrospect.

Ha ha! Skin cancer!

Well, I have some sun damage that I can get zapped with a laser if I'm ever rich and exceedingly vain. I definitely have better ways to spend my money right now. Also, the nurse recommended that I put this cream on my nose that's supposed to kill pre-cancerous cells (mostly as a precaution) based on some information that I gave her. I can't use the cream right now, though, because I'm still breastfeeding. The nurse said that I should probably get annual checkups with a dermatologist, so maybe I'll get the cream next year.

I think that one of my grandfathers had skin cancer at some point in his life. That's probably a genetic strike against me.

Ha ha... skin cancer...

Ant Farm

We got Elise an ant farm for Christmas and the ants just arrived in the mail. IT'S SO COOL!

Elise is really into the TV show Go Diego Go. She wants to be an "animal rescuer" just like Diego. So I thought she'd enjoy the ant farm. And she does. But I think I enjoy it more. Hee hee.

The Pee Pee Dance (of Happiness)

Henry is officially completely done with all forms of diapering. He no longer wears "pull up" diapers at night. Just undies. Just undies! 24 hours a day! Woo hoo!

We probably could have pushed the issue sooner and had him out of nighttime pull up diapers months ago. He'll be 4 years old in a couple of months, and I'd say we could have had him completely potty trained at 3 1/2 if we'd really been on our game. He's been keeping himself dry at night for a while now. But we have lots of kids and plenty of reasons to wake up in the middle of the night already. The last thing I want to do is wake up and change sheets and start a load of laundry. I figured, if he doesn't pee, great! And if he does, then I won't have to clean up the mess. What's the harm in keeping the diaper on him at night? But it got to the point where it was glaringly obvious Henry was ready to ditch the diapers-- when I found him using the bathroom on his own at 3 in the morning, I figured that he definitely had it all sorted out on his own.

Mommy happy dance! Yay!

Don't Ask, Don't Tell

Me: What was that noise?!?

Elise: Don't worry, Mommy. Henry wasn't REALLY pooping on me.

I don't even want to know...

Clark's 15 Month Check Up

Clark had his 15 month check up today. He is 32 inches tall (80th percentile) and 24 lbs and 12 oz (also 80th percentile). Looks like his size is finally starting to even out. Not in the top 10% anymore.

Poor Clarky got 3 shots today. After we left the doctor's office, he kept grabbing at the leg where he got the shot that the nurse said was going to sting and he would say, "Boo-boo! Boo-boo!" So sad.

Elisey Stories

Elise has been telling short stories lately.

"Mommy. When I was a leaf falling down, I got caught in a spiderweb."

"One time I was stuck in the mud, but a robot helped me."

"I like to take my rocket to outer space. Wanna come with me on my rocket to outer space, Daddy?"

"I don't like to go on that playground because of the tigers. There are tigers there that eat me."

Also, she spent part of our car ride today changing the lyrics to songs on children's shows (mostly Wonder Pets) to include the words "penis" and "vulva." It was funny.

January Is Vision Check Up Month

Because I alone manage the medical needs of five people and four cats (Husband mostly takes care of his own medical needs and issues), I have decided it is time to simplify my life a bit and try to put everyone on a schedule as much as possible. For the longest time, managing Henry and Georgia's medical issues was a tremendous task-- between frequent doctor's visits and visits to specialists, I was in a doctor's office at least once and sometimes twice every week. It was bonkers. But now everyone is current on their vaccines and chronic issues have been addressed, so it is time to make my life a little bit easier.

January is hereby "vision check up month." Everyone in the house who needs to get their eyes checked will do so in the month of January. Husband and I both wear glasses, so we're on that list. And Henry is 3 years old, so he is officially ready to start his yearly vision check ups, as well.

No more "Husband's last dental exam was in October, and I had one in November, and when was Henry's last exam? November, too? Or was it December?..." I can't keep all of that stuff straight. Since vision checks don't need to correspond to birthdays, the way children's vaccines and well visits usually do, I decided to make it easy to remember-- everyone goes in the same month, all in the beginning of the year.

Georgia's Privates

We've explained to the kids that saying something is private means that you don't want to share it with very many other people. Georgia now refers to her favorite foods as her "privates." Mashed potatoes with dinner the other night lead to a conversation about not wanting to share her privates with the rest of the family, and after making cupcakes today, Georgia yelled at Elise, "Don't touch my privates!"

(Georgia is all better today, by the way. Some crazy 24-hour thing, I guess. Of course, now Husband has it and it's making him twice as sick. Dang. I know I'm probably next...)

I Didn't Know There Is That Much Fluid In the Human Body

Georgia is sick. Sick sick. Diarrhea dripping down the sides of her diapers, puke flying everywhere sick. I cannot understand why she isn't just a dusty pile of bones on the floor because I had no idea that she had that much fluid available in her body. Other than the occasional "my tummy hurts," though, she seems to be doing mostly okay. She isn't lethargic or overly cranky or anything like that. We're giving her Pedialyte and just hoping for the best at this point.

Circus!

We took the kids to a circus recently. They all liked it, even Clark (he especially liked the high wire act). It was a two hour show, so their attention was flagging by the end. But overall, the kids enjoyed seeing the animals do tricks and the acrobats jump around.

I remember going to the circus when I was young. It was cool to take my own kids to do the same thing.

She Bit Me

Elise has been a lunatic today. Crazy temper tantrum in the book store, rotten and defiant behavior all day, and then she bit my arm right before bed. I don't know what her problem is, but she better have that shit out of her system by tomorrow because I will NOT be HALF as understanding as I was today.

Where Did All of This Crap Come From?

In hopes that we'll be moving soon (still waiting to hear if the bank has accepted our offer for the short sale of that house that we bid on recently), I've been going thorough some of our stuff and organizing what we want to keep and getting rid of what we don't want. Two trips to Goodwill and a pile of baby gear to consign later, and it still feels like I'll never see the end of it all.

Two adults and four kids sure can accumulate a lot of stuff.

All I know is that I'm not paying to move anything that we aren't sure we want to keep. So, I'm looking at all of this lag-time with the bank as a good opportunity to get organized.

Stop It!

Today at story time at the library, Clark kept misbehaving so I tried to distract/redirect him by laying him on the floor for a second and tickling him. He laughed and laughed. Then started screaming, "Stop it! STOP IT! STOOOOOOOP IIIIIIITTTT!!!" I didn't know that he knew to say that. And it was very weird to see a 15 month old screaming "stop it." How could anyone else in the children's section of the library today know that Clark has 3 older siblings who play-wrestle with each other (while yelling "stop it") OR that Clark is a freaking parrot who copies anything and everything he hears? Instead it looked like I yell "stop it" at my infant so often that not only did that phrase become some of his first words, but they are now his only means of self-defense from a lunatic mommy.

YOU stop it, Clark. You stop it.

The Art of Letter Writing

Henry is learning at school to write his ABCs. When he draws a capital E, he makes a line down and then four lines across. It's such a classic little kid move, like writing an S backwards. Super adorable. When I practice writing with him, he'll actually go back and "correct" our E's by adding in the fourth line later. Silly boy.

Have You Cried Enough Today?

Because I read about Irena Sendler just now and CRIED MY EYES OUT. She saved hundreds babies from Nazis. Saved babies from Nazis! I cried because Irena Sendler did something wonderful and amazing, and also because I can't imagine being a parent who is in such a helpless, hopeless situation that I would hand my child to a stranger (knowing that I will probably never see him again) because that is his best chance at survival.

And now I'm crying again. Fucking Nazis.

Link to the Snopes article

Link to the Wikipedia article

Also, she was a total babe:

Extension of My Sole

The girls got new shoes recently. The sneakers they picked out perfectly epitomize their personalities right now. Georgia picked out pink and white shoes with Disney princesses on them. Hearts. Flowers. Elise picked out black and red Spiderman sneakers from the boys' section. Georgia doesn't hate boy stuff and Elise doesn't hate girly girl stuff, but they are drawn to certain things and it's a safe bet that Georgia will like the cutesy things and Elise will like the stuff typically marketed toward boys.

I wonder if that will stick with them.

Potty On My Mind

Georgia finally peed in the potty at home!!!

Notice I said "at home." She apparently pees in the potty at school all the time.

At home, for the longest time Georgia would sit on the potty for a few minutes and then proudly declare, "I peed in the potty!" when in fact she hadn't. Husband and I would say, "Well, you didn't pee this time, but thanks for trying."

I assumed Georgia had duped the teachers at school, because they kept telling me how she uses the potty. I was thinking, yeah, right... they're just busy watching a zillion other kids and they're taking her word for it. But then the other day as I was picking Georgia up, I asked one of her teachers how her potty training is going at school.

"Great. She's still in the same diaper from this morning. Lately, she's been keeping herself dry almost all day."

And sure enough, she was still wearing the diaper she had left home in. She has a different brand of diapers at home and at school, so there was no mistaking it.

Damn.

So Husband and I were persistent this weekend! And she FINALLY FINALLY FINALLY peed on the potty at home. Here I had been thinking that she's just a late potty training bloomer. Nope! She didn't want to use the potty at home for some reason. Busted, Georgia! We know what's up now.

Oh, man. ONE kid in diapers soon. I'm so excited.

Molars!

During our holiday vacation, Clark kept sticking his fingers in his mouth and chewing on them waaaaaay at the back of his mouth. I figured he must be getting some teeth in, but he never got fussy so I assumed they hadn't poked through yet. He had a rough time when his front teeth were coming in, so I was bracing myself for the intense teething pain he'd get when his molars arrive.

A couple of days ago, I stuck my finger in his mouth, out of curiosity. He has one molar on each side on the top, practically all the way in! Yay for easy teething!

Elise Is Starting to Read!

Elise is starting to sound words out when she sees them. Short words. She needs a little bit of help fitting the letter sounds together smoothly. But she's starting to read!

Watch out world!

Are You Sorry Now?

Yesterday while Husband was tucking Elise in for a nap, she got mad at him for tickling her and she hit him. We then proceeded to try to make Elise say she was sorry.

"Elise! Tell Daddy you're sorry."

(She starts crying.)

"Tell me you're sorry for hitting me Elise. It's not nice to hit."

"Suh... suh... sar... sar... suh..."

"Elise! You need to say you're sorry!"

"Suh... sar... suh... I can't! My words won't work!"

This went on for a while. She could say every other word in the English language perfectly fine, but for some reason "sorry" couldn't come out of her mouth.

"Elise. Tell Daddy you're sorry for hitting him or you'll go to time out."

"Suh... suh... IT'S NOT POSSIBLE!"

It's the worst when kids make you break character (that character being the stern parent) because they've said something ridiculous. Husband and I were trying so hard not to laugh.

She eventually apologized.

Elise Medicine Update: Pepcid

Elise's medicine has been changed. I'm supposed to give her half a tablet of Pepcid Complete once a day. They're chewable, flavored pills... like candy. So Elise is in heaven.

No reaction to the medicine so far. Hopefully the Pepcid will cure her nausea.

Babies and Food

* Georgia has been an amazing eater lately. Anything we give her, she eats. All of it. Cleans her plate. Peas, green beans, red beans and rice, cheddar and broccoli quiche... anything. I love it!

* Clark still has an awesome vocabulary, and the words he says are so clear. Lately he talks and talks about apple juice. "Adda jooz." He seriously loves apple juice. Oh. And goddammit. He's started copying the big kids by saying "what happened?" and "why?" He uses them in the proper context, too. He's always been great about saying things in the proper context. For example, Elise will fart really loudly and Clark will turn to me and say, "Wha happa?" And I'll say, "Elise tooted." And then Clark will say, "Why?" So I'll explain. He also has started asking "why" after he's been given an instruction (just like the big kids). I'll tell him to put his bear back in the toy box and he'll say, "Why?" Ugh.

Well, Scratch the Prevacid

I gave Elise some Prevacid last night before bed, per a nurse practitioner's orders. She's two years old and I was told to give her one 15mg pill. Elise woke up a few hours after bedtime, puked (so much for helping her nausea), and then scratched her body like crazy. Her torso, head, face, arms, legs... everything itched. There was no visible rash or hives, but her skin was all red from the scratching. Husband eventually gave Elise some Benadryl to stop the itching.

I called a nurse today, and as I suspected would be the case, was advised that Elise might be allergic to the medication and that I should discontinue using it. Poor Elisey. I tried to help her, but the medicine I gave her made her feel worse. I don't think that Prevacid is one of those drugs that commonly has side effects, but the nurse said that it's possible for a person to have a reaction to any medicine, so I guess Elise is just one of the unlucky few who can't take it.

Ho Ho Hurl

Elise has been having vomiting problems.

It started while we were on vacation visiting family over the Christmas holiday. The first time it happened, we were in Target. Elise said she wasn't feeling well and that she wanted me to hold her. I picked her up and carried her while I pushed Clark in the front seat of a shopping cart. Husband had the other two kids in a separate cart. As I was walking past the greeting cards, Elise says, "Moooooommy. I don't feel well." And then drenched me in vomit. My shirt was covered, her shirt was covered. Vomit was dripping down her pants, and had pooled in my shoe. Vomit was coming out of her nose. I yelled for Husband to go find an employee, so he took Clark and ran off with the kids while Elise puked all over me three more times.

Get this, though. People were walking by, making eye contact with me. Not one of those assholes said, "Are you guys ok?" or "Can I go get someone for you?" No one. I know puke is gross and whatever, but be a decent human being and at least ask a person who is clearly in distress if you can go get someone else to help. Merry Christmas, jerkwads.

I couldn't leave the spot we were in because there was vomit all over the floor and I didn't want someone to slip in it. So I waited for Husband and the Target employee to arrive and then asked Husband to go buy me a new shirt. While the employee cleaned the floor, I took Elise's shoes off, changed her shirt, and put clean pants on her. I always have a change of clothes for the kids in my diaper bag. Thank god.

Not a change of clothes for me, though. So I had to walk to the front of the store and to the restrooms literally covered in vomit. It was pretty awful. Elise felt better after she puked, so she was doing good by that point. Once I got changed and cleaned up, everyone was okay.

The second time Elise puked was while we were opening presents on Christmas morning. Sorry, Nana. At least it wasn't as much vomit as the first time.

The third time Elise puked, she came into our bedroom around 6:00 in the morning after we'd gotten back home from our vacation the night before and she said, "Mommy. I'm going to vomit." Which she did. On our bed. My side.

Then she threw up this morning. In the toilet this time. (Yay!)

Elise never had a fever, diarrhea, constipation, a bad cold with queeze-inducing post-nasal drip... nothing. None of the other kids got sick, either. I took her to the doctor this morning and the current line of thinking is that she has reflux right now. She has to take Prevacid for the next two weeks to see if that helps. I hope it does. Poor baby.

Maybe a House

Our offer was accepted on a house. We still have a LOT of hoops to jump through, though, so no time to celebrate just yet. It's a short sale, so the bank still needs to approve the amount we offered, there needs to be an inspection of the property, and our financing all needs to come through.

Fingers crossed.

I don't love this house. It will do. It's about 400 sq feet bigger than the house we have now, plus a garage (which we don't have presently). Also there's a porch that can be enclosed and an obvious place to add on by building an addition, if we ever feel so inclined and can afford it. The neighborhood is a little too "suburbia" for my taste, but it's in good school zones and has relatively low crime rates.

It will be nice to move closer to family and old friends. Also the city where we're moving has unbelievably awesome parks and playgrounds. The last time we were in town, some random dad at one of the playgrounds turned to me and said, "I never had a playground even close to this cool when I was growing up," and I said, "Yeah, me either." Then we both turned and looked at our children with equal parts love and bitter jealousy in our hearts.

Good Day, 2013!

We had a nice New Year's Day yesterday. We took our annual first-day-of-the-year family photo. With four toddlers, no family photo is going to be a "good" picture. It's passable. Everyone is looking at the camera and no one is crying their eyes out. That's all I can ask for at this point.

We also baked cookies together, as per our family tradition. We made dark chocolate chip cookies. Everyone helped, even Clark. And the cookies are yummy.

So far so good, 2013. So far so good.

Actually, It's a TRIKE

Because we were travelling during Christmastime this year, we let the kids open their presents early at home. Among other things, the girls got trikes (Henry already had one).

After we got back home, we took some of their Christmas money and bought the three oldest kids bike helmets. Henry's looks like a dinosaur face. Georgia's is Barbie brand and is pink with hearts. Elise picked out a boy's helmet that is blue with dragons and medieval knights on it. I think they love the helmets more than their trikes. They wear them around the house.

Sometimes I accidentally refer to their recreational "vehicles" as bikes. Every time-- every f-ing time-- Elise pipes up and says, "Actually, it's a TRIKE." I finally told her she would be getting a pocket protector for Christmas next year. Nerd.

Elise picked up on pedaling really quickly. Georgia still doesn't get it. She puts her feet on the pedals but she can't figure out how to make the trike go. I've tried showing her and explaining it so many ways. Push down on the pedals one at a time. Act like you're walking while you sit down. Kick the pedals down. Down and around, down and around! She just doesn't get it. She will eventually. Until then, I'll be kicking the back of her trike the whole way down the street.